A large laminated official-looking sign to be affixed in a prominent position on or adjacent to the most visible external door on the evening and night of 31 October.

Reads "WARNING ! CORONAVIRUS QUARANTINE ! DO NOT APPROACH !"

Should keep most of 'em well away ...

DeLuxe version comes with a fake dispenser for hand sanitizer; in fact, contains a clear, sticky liquid based on corn syrup and capsacin, causing extreme discomfort when it contacts mucous membranes; purposely difficult to remove once dried. Also indelibly stains skin and clothing.
-- 8th of 7, Oct 20 2020

"8th lives here" should be enough to keep them away. Meanwhile, a Trump/Pence sign in the lawn will act as a magnet for the brain-dead Hillbilly juniors.
-- xenzag, Oct 20 2020


// the hand sanitizer meets the helpfile's definition of cruelty, //

Perhaps, but it's an optional extra, not intrinsic to the idea, so we dispute the validity of your [m-f-d].

The basic idea is neither cruel nor a booby trap. Clearly further development is needed.

The prank hand sanitizer has some interest as a standalone idea.
-- 8th of 7, Oct 21 2020


Just rename it "Trump or Treat"
-- xenzag, Oct 21 2020


Oh, we like that ...
-- 8th of 7, Oct 21 2020


No, we want to keep them away, not scarringly traumatize them for life.
-- RayfordSteele, Oct 21 2020


Speak for yourself ...

Now we are trying to work out how to elide "Triage or Treat" into an HB idea ...
-- 8th of 7, Oct 27 2020


[8of7]'s "hand sanitiser" isn't original, folks. It's the result of his own bitter experience.

One of the guys in his unit. in Iraq, once laced his lube with capsaicin and supaglue.

Hilarity ensued.
-- UnaBubba, Oct 29 2020


Some people have a very odd idea of "hilarious".
-- 8th of 7, Oct 29 2020


I take it you now see the similarly hilarious nature of this idea and your unfortunate "intimate self-encounter", when they are in close juxtaposition?
-- UnaBubba, Oct 29 2020


Hilarious is "something that happens to someone else".
-- 8th of 7, Oct 29 2020



random, halfbakery