Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'

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DrBob


"Luring members of the Ooolongftangftangbank profile scheme to their deaths since 1837".

Status: Fairly relaxed.

"Noise, noise, noise is for heroes. Leave the music to zeros." [The Damned]

Poem No.2

Scrolling through the ‘bakery,
Reading the ideas,
Taking in the annos,
All the boos and all the cheers.
Some of them are practical
And some of them are witty,
And all of them inspired me
To write this little ditty.


The Ravings of an Eedjit (Poem No.1)

I met a surfer from a half-baked site
Who said: One croissant and a pile of bones
Stand by my idea. And beneath, in harsh anno’s,
half sunk, my shattered posting lies, whose prose
And spelling poor, and mix of many tense
Tell that its author was not well read.
Which yet survive, writ on the world wide web,
By pedants mocked and newbies shred;
And on my posting these words appear:
“We should use nanobots, and GM tech;
Why can’t we all just learn to share?”
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
of that vast WIBNI, heated and terse,
The flames stretch down the page.


e-mail MrKeithManiac at hotmail etc, etc

Advice to new halfbakers:
Don't try too hard! The best ideas are the ones that appear in your head out of nowhere. If you have to take more than a few seconds to think about it then it's probably not that good.

Of course this is no guarantee of quality, but it will save a lot of wasted time.


[Jun 27 2000, last modified Sep 04 2008]
   
(+3) A Better Mousetrap
(+7, -16)(+7, -16) Abolish Enforceable Contracts
(+5, -4) 'Active' Status
(+9, -2) AirBagz(tm) for Clothing
(+3, -7) Alan Tracy is a Wimp
(+3) Alarm Bag
(+7, -1) Augean Gutter Cleaning System
(+4, -5) Automatic Opinion Polls
(+7, -1) Big Sister
(+5, -1) Burning Food Detector
(+8, -1) Buttock Massage
(+1, -8)(+1, -8) Call Queuing Adverts
(+15, -3)(+15, -3) Catapult to Work
(+10)(+10) Centrifugal Human Cannonball
 Cheap Executive Toys
(+5, -4) Cnut Roast
(+8) Darts Boots
(+3) Dead Man's Pause
(+3, -1) Deflateable Inflateables
(+5, -1) Dynastic Dashboard Display
(+1) Electro Static Wall Tiles
(+5, -3) Empty Paper Tray Shutdown
(+36, -7)(+36, -7)(+36, -7) Freudian Slips
(+12)(+12) Global Pandemic Alerts
(+5, -1) Hair Styling Pillows
(+7, -4) Halfbakery Electoral College
(+2, -1) Halfbakery Evolution
(+14, -4)(+14, -4) Hate Hearts
(+4, -1) Haunted Halfbakery
(+12)(+12) Helicopter Ceiling Fan
(+6) Hobnail Ballet
(+1) Insurance insurance
(+5, -1) Integrated Hot Water Tap and Bubble Bath Dispenser
(+7, -3) Liar's Day
(+6, -4) Liz Takes Command
(+30, -3)(+30, -3)(+30, -3) Luminous Books
(+9)(+9) Mixed Morsels
(+3, -1) Mobile Pub
(+6, -10) Moral Support Counsellor
(+3, -2) Move Christmas into January
(+4, -1) Muzak Zapper
(+7, -2) Name That Country
(+5, -3) Pedometer Powered Mobile Phone
(+3, -1) Personal Periscope
(+13, -2)(+13, -2) Plug and Play Body Parts
(+11)(+11) Poem No.2
(+13, -5) Ramones Intro
 Rant Room
(+1) Roller Bed
(+8, -4) Standardised Buttock Measurements
(+19, -1)(+19, -1) Star Gaps
(+15, -5)(+15, -5) Symbiotic Ideas
(+2) The All-Fools Tour of England
(+18, -3)(+18, -3) The Flamer's Guide to halfbakery
(+6, -5) The Gastronome Codex
(+8, -1) The Lumbago
(+1) Time Futures
(+36, -1)(+36, -1)(+36, -1) Tornado Leaping
(+5, -6) Traffic Jam
 Urinal Fairing
(-1) Wheelchair Mouse
 
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